writers block

This evening I got an itch to be writing. My mind won't stand still long enough to form a premise but it wants to write. I spend all my free time reading what others have transcribe from their thoughts and I want to do the same.

I don't necessarily want to be published (although that would be pretty cool!) but I want to be actively writing, putting my degree to use ... even if it is just for me and my eyes (which it will be)..

I don't know what it's going to be about but I know that it won't be realistic. I live in a fantasy world where vampires are beautiful and wizards speak with English accents. What fun is it to write about something that could actually happen?

And so the lion fell in love wit the lamb ...

... What a stupid lamb.

Dana and I went to the midnight showing of Twilight last night and I must say that it exceeded all of my expectations. It was true to the book in virtually every way and I can't wait to see it again. There was also a trailer for the 6th Harry Potter movie and it looks like it is actually going to be pretty decent so July needs to come soon.

Anyway, the new job is going very well I think. I'm learning a lot and am pretty much flying solo. Today especially since Ray (the main manager) is off so I'll probably be routing by myself today. I also get to go in a noon which is nice. I got a good 8 hours of sleep last night so hopefully it will knock this cold out of me fast. I feel like crap and my immune system has gone to shit these past few months.

I have a guilty conscience

So something semi-major has happened to me. It's a long story but to summarize the MAIN manager of the service department at Abt (he's incharge of service, parts, dispatch, routing AND the technicians) asked me if he could steal me from parts and put me in routing. He told my boss about it before asking me and she, of course, told me to prepare me ... and, what I later put together, to brainwash me into staying with her.

That put me in a pickle. Should I stay with her because I know everything, am really good at it, the technicians LOVE me AND she just got me a $1.50 raise that Tony (the main manager) wasn't aware of? Yes, that is reason to stay. However, it is not reason enough to pass up another $1 an hour PLUS a promotion (I would essentially be a manager).

Needless to say I took the job and she is NOT happy AT all. Oh well, I need to get over that.

So, long story short, I start that gig tomorrow and I'll let you know how it all pans out.

Bonus perk ... I no longer have to wake up at 4:30 am to be at work by 5:30. Happy day.

birds of a feather ...

This week as been a disaster. Monday I worked from 5:30-2:45. Tuesday, from 5:30-10:30. Wednesday, my scheduled day off. Thursday from 5:30-2:15. Friday, from 5:30-8:30 and today, Saturday, I called in ... for the first time ever. 

I am 16 hours short for the week. I have 2 options to make up the hours: Either A) use 16 of my remaining 64 vacation hours or B) work 16 hours of overtime next week to make up for it. 

Option B should not be a problem. I'm starting to feel better. I am not really nauseous any more and my fever is definitely down so I will be going to work on Monday regardless. 

I find it funny that I was the 1st in my family to get the flu, and the last to recover. I got sick on Monday. My dad got sick on Tuesday (supposed food poisoning from White Castle). My brother got sick on Thursday (supposed food poisoning from Taco Bell) I got sicker on Friday as did my mom. My dad spent yesterday taking care of my mom & I and today everyone but me is going about their daily routines. 

Me, however, am almost finished with season 3 of Grey's Anatomy, which I started watching yesterday. I finally ate 5 saltines, which is the first thing I've eaten since dinner Thursday night (it's 4:45pm Saturday right now). I've lost 7 pounds in 2 days. There is half a bowl of Halloween candy sitting on the counter by the front door and I really want to eat it.

Okay, my head is starting to hurt from sitting up for too long.

Fe fe fi fi fo fo fum

So I just finished getting my Halloween costume together (what I could find of it anyway) and turns out I look more like the spawn of Hellboy rather than what I was actually going for (Devil with a blue dress). Who knew finding devil horns would be damn near impossible! If I did find some they were WAY too sparkly *insert Jeff Dunham impression here* and/or WAY too small. So I had to settle on demon horns which I have to manage to glue onto my red headband.

And I couldn't find a tail long enough to my liking :(

But I do have a staff thing that I'm going to put red ribbon on :)

AND I get to wear my hooker boots to work :)

It should be a good day tomorrow.

OOO...and it's payday and it's the check where I get my raise!! :)

Happy haunting!

I need my mommy :(

This weekend was one of the best of my life. I hung out with great friends, felt like I was on Dancing with the Stars & met some new people.

Today seems like one of the worst. I went to bed feeling fine. I woke up with my throat laced with sandpaper. I shook it to the side and went to work. Progressively feeling worse through the morning I kept with it and got everything done in a timely manner. The girl I work with in the morning (who is pushing 40) called in at 8:30 (she is supposed to come in at 7:30) saying her back was bothering her. Whatever, I hope you get fired. At this point I'm feeling a little bit better and now I have to train one of our new employees.

Luckily time flies and before I know it it's 2:45 (I'm supposed to leave at 2) and I leave. I get home and my ass sits on the couch and stays there. I have on layers upon layers as well as 2 blankets and a comforter. I have the chills like no other, a terrible headache and my body aches from head to toe.

"You should have gotten a flu shot."

Well, the last time I did that I got the flu (well over 5 years ago) so that's not an option. The last time I felt this bad I had pneumonia my sophomore year of college. I just took my temperature and it was 102. I'm no doctor but that's pretty damn high. And my mom, the RN, is not home to recommend something for me.

Currently I have taken a hot shower and am curled up on the couch, hoodie over my head determined to sweat this thing out. The chills are tamed for now and I managed to eat a granola bar and have a half drank cup of green tea next to me.

I WILL go to work tomorrow. A) I can't afford to use any of my sick days B) I can't afford to lose any money and C) I obviously can't rely on anybody else to show up on time to cover for me.

Oh yeah, and my cell phone died and my charger is at work so I couldn't get a hold of my boss to call in in a reasonable manner anyway.

I just hope I feel better :(

I believe in Harvey Dent

In the year and a half we've been dating, the longest I've got without seeing Greg is 3 weeks. Now I have to go 5. Five weeks! That's forever. Our schedules (okay maybe just his) are insanely busy these next handful of weeks.

This weekend is Western's homecoming so he'll be doing all sorts of fraternity stuff. I really want to go but I have to work. But I also get to dog sit for my Aunt's old college friend (roommate I think?) who also happens to be part of the morning show on XLC. Woot! I could definitely use the extra dough and time away from my own house. (my dad & brother are diving in La Paz so it's just my mom & I at home ... I need a break!)

Next weekend I'm venturing off to the Quad Cities for a wedding. I'm John's date since he's in the wedding and doesn't have a g/f of his own to take.

The following weekend is Halloween so naturally I'm doing something, plus I have to work that Saturday. I have the next 2 saturday's off but his schedule is so filled with JSO (Jazz band) stuff that he wouldn't be able to see me.

I'm still contemplating going down there and spending time with other people just to get out of this town for a few days.

Nothing else too exciting. Another 6 day work week this week so the paycheck'll be nice (that we get on Halloween) and payday is this Friday so double awesome!

Speaking of Halloween, I think I've decided what I'm going to be. I was going to be Sarah Palin because I can pull that off without having to buy anything. But I guess everyone else had the same idea so I was going to go as her when she was runner up for Miss Alaska but didn't feel like spending money on a retro prom dress.

So I decided to be Rachel Dawes (the chick from the Dark Knight). There's a top I've been eyeing for about a month now and if I go as her I'll have an excuse to buy it :). I just need to make a Gotham City PD nametag and maybe an 'I believe in Harvey Dent' button.

I wanted to be Pepper Potts from Iron Man but I don't look good in a blonde wig.

In other exciting news, I found out from my boss today that she sent in a request for a $2.00 raise for me!! Hooray!! She said to expect at least a $1.50 of that so I'm excited! All the more incentive for me to stay there until who knows when because God knows I'm not going to find something that pays that good to start!

Okay, time to be productive.

I'm still breathing ... for now

Just a quick update to prove I'm still alive.

This past week and a half has been absolutely crazy. Saturday I punched out from work with 60 hours. Today is Wedesday and I've worked 24 hours this week, and I still have 3 more days to go. The paycheck will be nice, however, and I will be able to pay off one more credit card. In October we get 3 paychecks so I should be able to pay off one of my main cards ... or at least bring it down to under $200.

I'm trying trying trying to work on the spending. It's going ok I guess ... definitely a cut back from what I used to do. It'll get better ... all over time. I do need to start putting away money for Christmas shopping though. That always sucks. I LOVE shopping for people and tend to go overboard. I'll need to cut back on that.

Okay, time to go relax and work on some more laundry.

A post like this requires bullets ...

• One of my best friends got engaged yesterday. I couldn't be happier for her and I'm guessing for a wedding next summer.
• I'm more than likely staying with my parents and I'm okay with that. I've got plans to pay off debt and attempt to save a little
• I'm working TONS of overtime and I love it. I don't mind working 6 days a week because I know I desperately need the money
• I am constantly being asked if I'm losing weight. I can't see it but I'm flattered others are taking notice.
• I DO need to get in the habit of exercising.
• I've introduced myself to a new series and I absolutely LOVE it. I've read the 1st 3 books in 3 days and just ordered the remaining 5.
• The Cubs lucky number is 7 and they never cease to amaze me.
• Carlos Zambrano pitched a no-hitter yesterday ... the 1st done by a Cubs since Milt Pappas in 1972.
• Milwaukee continues to be my favorite city to watch the Cubs play in ...
• ... It's also more entertaining when they're not playing the Brewers.
• Ted Lilly threw a 1 hitter today ... hittless through 7. Very impressive considering he's one of our weakest.
• Milwaukee dropped the last 4 to the Phillies, concluding in the canning of Ned Yost this afternoon ... I can't say I'm surprised. They choked last year too.

That's really it. Time for TLC on Monday night!

I am not a fun person to be around right now

I am about ready to scream. Work is stressful. I'm constantly getting out at 3-3:30 because we're so busy. Yeah, it's overtime and the money will be nice, but it's aggravating because it's not my departments job I'm doing. We get flooded with service calls because apparently we don't have enough to do with our own calls, part orders and whiny technicians to deal with.

Other than that, life is still aggravating. I'm on a very short circuit and snap at almost everybody. I've been trying to keep to my self and not say anything lately just so I don't offend innocent bystanders.

Dana and I went to look at an apartment yesterday. It's in Vernon Hills and we LOVE it. No complaints whatsoever. It is more expensive but it's totally worth it. Fifteen minutes to work with no traffic. The only thing holding us up is Dana's boyfriend Bob. He just interviewed for a job in Milwaukee and if he gets it, then she's going to get an apartment with him in Kenosha.

I'm trying to weigh my options here. If that happens, I think I'm going to stay at home, convince my parents to only let me give them $200 a month to help with costs. I can also go back to school and not take out any loans ... at least for now. Score for me.

If we do get the apartment, I'm going to need to take out a loan.

We'll cross that bridge when it gets to that point.

Or I might put the idea of school on the back burner for now and just concentrate on working.

Who knows.

insert something witty here

I've decided to go for it. I 'applied' today for CLC and am going to call tomorrow to set up an appointment with an adviser to discuss the process for me to get my teaching certificate. I need to apply for students loans and that scares but, but I figure 90% of those who go to college need to take out some kind of loan. Plus, it's going to be substantially cheaper per semester. I was looking at tuition rates and it's only about $100 a credit hour after fees and I don't have to worry about room and board or anything.

Ideally, I'd like to take 3 or 4 classes in the spring but it all depends on what times things are offered and what I actually do need to take. I don't believe I'm going to be able to do everything through CLC but transferring credits is easy enough and I just want to get this done so I can actually move onto a career.

Nothing else really more to say. The weekend was amazing. I got to catch up with a lot of people and just relax. I went to Maurices and got a couple of cute tops that I cannot wait to wear.

It's going to be a lot of working for the next couple of weeks. Nothing too big going on ... just the real world.

I know who killed Jon Benett ....

Gah ... my family drives me crazy sometimes. I baked banana bread tonight because my boss gave me bananas to do so and all my parents (especially my mother) did was tell me how do it. Seriously people, back off! You're not doing it, leave me alone!

Anyway, tomorrow I head down to Macomb for the weekend and I'm taking Ricky with me so he can visit Kim. After working 5:30am-9:15pm yesterday (with only an hour break), I'm in need of a weekend off. The schedule is loose but structured ... I like that. Tomorrow night Greg and I are hanging out with Matt and Saturday is the first home game followed by the Cafe. I need to go to Maurices sometime in there and visit with Alyssa.

Right now my parents are watching McCain's speech. Now while I'm more towards the conservative side than liberal, this guy drives me crazy. I have no words for him other than it's completely obviously he's reading of a telepromter. His eyes are so glazed over and focused, it's ridiculous. Sarah Palin was a good move on his part but it's not like it's going to help him any. If he wins this election I'll be in complete awe of what morons make up this nation and what even bigger morons didn't make it out to the polls, simply because 'what does it matter' or 'I'm too busy.' It's bullshit.

My dad was saying that it may be Hilary vs Palin in 2012 or 2016. I can see that. I can also see me moving oversees when that happens.

Okay, time for bed. It's been a long day and will be an ever longer one tomorrow. I wanted to get a nap in today but didn't :(

Back in the swing of things

Well I'm all moved back in with my parents. Who knows how long I'll be staying for but the commute to work will sure be a nice break.

Not much really to update on. I'm getting a lot better; still a little congested but nothing that won't be 100% cured by Friday when I head down to Macomb for the weekend.

Speaking of Macomb, it seems it's going to be a big reunion weekend (for me anyway). Karlene heard I was coming and decided that she's going to come too. AND, I was able to almost convince Joe (Miller) to meet us down there as well. I haven't seen him in over 2 years and it's time for him, Katie, Kevin & I to do some serious damage.

That's really all I've got for now. I slept for almost 12 hours last night and think I'll be all caught up on my sleep by the time I have to go back to work on Tuesday. Hooray for 4 days weeks :)

Lisa, vampires are make-believe; like elves, gremlins & eskimos

I swear I have some sort of sickness ... aside from the massive cold I inherited from my co-worker, anyway.

With the apartment packed up, with the exception of the essentials I need to survive the rest of the week, I have come to realize I have a lot of time on my hands. I packed away all DVDs and don't really feel like staring at the TV for hours on end that I turned to one of my favorite past times; reading.

I've already mentioned that I've read "Twilight," the 1st of 4 books in the series by Stephanie Meyer. On Sunday I managed to read the 2nd book, "New Moon." All of it. All 580+ pages of it. I literally sat on the couch for a good portion of 9 hours reading. It's amazing I don't have a massive headache from it. The only thing that sucks is that I wanted to read while lounging out by the pool since it was a GORGEOUS day outside. However, due to the nice sign outside the office that said the pool was closed due to no lifeguard, I was stuck inside because I didn't have the energy to drive anywhere (not that there was anywhere else to go).

So I finished the 2nd book. My mom only gave me the first 2 because she hadn't read the 2nd two yet (and probably didn't think I would manage to read 1,100 pages in 4 days). I thought I could go until I moved back home to wait to continue the journey, but I was mistaken. I stopped at Borders on my way home from work today and bought "Eclipse." I also picked up "Marked," another Vampire series that was sitting on the 'recommended' table because I love reading about the supernatural, especially Vampires.

I got home and decided since I bought the 3rd book, I might as well complete the set. I bought the other 3 - because I love books and will eventually read them again ... and again ... and again. I also bought the other 2 books of the other Vampire series along with the 1st 2 or 3 (I can't remember) of another series I've been meaning to read by the same author of 2 series (with 12 books each plus a 3 book conclusion .. and then a new series on a different character that is in process now...eee!) that I've read countless times. My mom yells at me every couple of months when she catches me re-reading them. It's rediculous.

I VERY rarely read books that aren't apart of a series. I love the continuation of stories. I love character development. I don't think one book is enough for my mind. I feel like I grow with the characters and they are my friends too.

Okay, I've rambled on enough about my love for reading ... time to get back to "Eclipse!"

and then there were 2 ...

Tonight my mom called me and left a message that my Grandma Hannah died this morning. She seemed somber yet I couldn't help but breathe a sigh of relief, as I'm sure my dad did as well .... that is after he finished doing cartwheels around the living room.

Yeah, I know. We're going to hell. But let me explain. She is my dad's stepmother and straight off the boat from Germany. Sure she taught me how to play canasta and took me to Silver Dollar City, and allowed me (ok my dad allowed it) to use her money to pay off my Visa so I wouldn't have to pay finance charges; but all in all she was a bitchy old hag. Ok, maybe that's a little too harsh but she wasn't a very pleasant person to be around.

The person I feel for the most is my dad. He became her official guardian a few months (maybe a year) ago and has been dealing with legal stuff and calls from the police when she as accused him of stealing her scooter keys. Now there's the matter of sorting everything out. It'll be a long process but at least there's light at the end of the tunnel.

Is it wrong that I didn't cry when my dad's dad and stepmom died? I'm typically a very emotional person and have cried during commercials. Something must be said about that.

Okay, 2 blogs are enough for one day. Back to packing.

something about vampires

If you know me at all, you know I'm a huge bookworm who loves nothing better than lounging around in a cozy little nest indulging myself in a great story.

My mom recently told me about "Twilight" the lastest book series craze to hit the nation since, well, since I don't even know. Most people I know (girls) have already read it and I can't believe I haven't heard about it prior.

She lent me the first 2 books Monday and they are not small; I'm talking 400+ words and decently small print. I started reading "Twilight" on Wednesday and finished it up today. I am addicted. It is damn near impossible to put down and as soon as I'm done writing this I'm going to curl up on the couch and start the 2nd one.

Other than escaping to a land of romance with a vampire, the thing that excites me most is the fact that a movie is already finished and will be released on December 12, 2008. Looking into the movie's cast, I can't believe how many actors/actresses are from some of my favorite TV shows & movies. For instance:

Cam Gigandet is playing James. He played Volchek on 'The OC' and definitely has that stereotypical bad boy image about him.
Elizabeth Reaser is playing Esme Cullen. She was Jane Doe/Rebecca on 'Grey's Anatomy.'
Billy Burke is playing Charlie. He was/is Jack, Bobby's older brother on 'My Boys.'
Nikki Reed is playing Rosalie. She was also on 'The OC' playing Sadie.

but the best one?

Robert Pattinson is playing Edward. Who is he, you ask? Well, he only played one of the greatest Quidditch players ever! Cedric Diggory :)

I can't wait :) Aaaaannndddd ... rumor has it the release date got moved up to November 21st after they pushed back Harry Potter and the HBP 9 months.

eeee!!

What I did on my summer vacation ...

I'll be the first person to admit that I tear up very easily when it comes to movies or series finales of my favorite tv shows. But not very often do I tear up over a news story. Today was a definite first. It is probably one of the most touching stories I have read in a LONG time.

When Heath Ledger died earlier this year he was working on another movie; "The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus." Since his death filming has continued with Johnny Depp, Collin Ferrel and Jude Law all stepping in for Ledger's role. It has just been released that all 3 actors have donated their earnings from the new movie to Ledger's 2 year old daughter, Matilda. The reason? Because Ledger never updated his will to include her and they wanted to make sure she had a secure future.

Is that not the sweetest thing ever?

Nothing else really to update other than I move out in a week and a half and need to start packing and cleaning. Greg went back to school today so I need to get used to not having him around all the time.

Today I worked the night shift, and tomorrow I'm back to my normal hours. Not a fun turnaround.

Before I go to bed, there's one question that's been on my mind today.

Everybody is going back to school. Most high schools started this week and it leads me to wonder about Shawn Johnson. She's obviously still in high school, yet during an interview yesterday she said she was staying in Bejing for the rest of the week. I can't imagine her going back to school and trying to go back to her normal life. She's a celebrity now. That would make some "What I did on my summer vacation" essay.

You say it's your birthday

Last night was probably one of the best outings I've had in years.

Marianne, Bethany, Charlie and I decided to try out something new and went to Boogie Nights, a discoteque in West Chicago. They strickly play music from the 70's, 80's and 90's. We walked in to Love Shake and left to Last Dance with so many other great songs inbetween. 

The highlights: I was brought back to my middle school days when I got to shake it to the Venga Boys & Cotton Eyed Joe. One of Charlie's friends was in shock when I knew all the words to Mamma Mia and Marianne and I even danced with an old man who looked very much like Hugh Heffner. 

There were a lot of previous generations there and no college whores. It was a great place and I'm sad I won't get to go there very often after the move. 

However, we will be going there one more time. Wednesday the 27th is Ladies Night and it's only from 8-10 so that's doable since I have to work bright and early in the morning. It is strictly for ladies only and there's a $20 cover which includes open bar and lots and lots of giveaways. I think that's totally worth it.

When we got home last night the apartment complex decided they wanted to shut our water off for some reason. Now I feel very gross and can't take a shower unit at least later this afternoon.

Happy birthday to me.

Is there anyone out there 'cuz it's getting harder and harder to breathe

Today started out to be the crappiest day ever. Work sucked. I got a new desk though (thank god) and no longer have to sit next to a chatty kathy who thinks she's god's gift to the parts department. However, when they were moving my computer something happened and now it won't work. So hopefully I'll be getting a new one tomorrow.

Anyway, the good news.

On my way home from work my favorite radio station (102.3 XLC) was giving away concert tickets to caller 10. I decided, what the hell, i would call. I was caller 5. boo. So i called back. AND I WON!!!! WOO!!!! I (and hopefully Dana if she ever calls me back) am going to see Maroon 5 (woo!), Counting Crows (woo!) and Sarah Barelis (eh) August 23rd in Milwaukee!

Hooray!!

Happy early birthday to me!

And then my mom called saying they couldn't make it to dinner on my birthday this sunday. ummm....WTF? I'm your daughter. It's my birthday.

Whatever, I'll go to Greg's and spend my birthday with his family. It's just another day anyway. Whoopie de fricken do. I'm 23.

Congratuations. to me.

SILENCE! I'll keel you

Yesterday Greg & I (along with a couple people from work) went to see Jeff Dunham in South Bend, IN. It was my birthday present and I couldn't have asked for a better one :)

It was, to say the absolute least, hilarious. All of his material was new and from his upcoming Christmas special. I can't remember the last time I laughed that hard. It's a toss up for what the best part was. There were 3 front runners that just bear repeating.
1) Jeff reciting "The Night Before Christmas" with Peanut. I can't really explain it, you just have to believe me and then watch the special on comedy central this November.
2) The encore. Jeff came out and said he had so many requests to bring out Bubba J. He did and even admitted that he hasn't used him in so long that he needed to use a cheat sheet for all the jokes. Quickly into the act he noticed that the audience was reciting it along with him and mentioned (by way of puppet) that it's sad when the audience can recite the skit better than he can. It seemed to be a first for him because he was definitely taken aback and found it hilarious. I, however, don't do it justice in writing; It was definitely one of those 'had to be there moments.'
3) Jeff told a story (sans puppets) about a women he met who had never hear of him or any of his acts. She said that she was a 1st grade substitute teacher and after going to see him she had a class and tried to get them to settle down. After a few failed attempts she finally yelled "silence!" and I guess some kid said back "I keel you." I would have absolutely died of laughter. A 6 year old! Hilarious.

Anyway, today was a rather odd day.

On my way to work I was listening to 102.3 as usual. One of the DJ's had a trivia question and wanted to know if anyone new the answer. The question was, what popular children's game is known in France as Roshambo. Well, I knew the answer (for some strange reason) and called up. I got right through and was on the radio!! I didn't win anything though, which I thought was mega lame.

But anyway, the odd part. I get to work a few minutes later and see my uncle walking through the door. I mention to him that I was on the radio and he asked me which station. I told him and he said that Jennifer (the DJ who asked the question) went to college with my Aunt Katie and was on the loop 100.3 (when it was still around) a few years ago. I had dog sat for her dogs (duh) my junior year of high school! I found that very strange that I didn't even know that.

People's voices are very different on the radio.

By the way, the answer was rock, paper, scissors. :)

How do you like your eggs in the morning?

I'm not one to be serious, especially in my writing, but today is a rare exception.

I read an article in the newspaper last week that really struck my attention. Many people donate blood, plasma, and even sperm (for guys, of course) for financial compensation. However, this article was about the rise in young women (ages 21-35) donating their eggs to those who are less fortunate to have children on their own. Not only is that a heroic deed and an unbelievable gift to give some family, the compensation starts at $7,000. That's a lot of dough; enough, in fact, to relieve me of 90% of my self-inflicted debt.

For the past week I have been highly considering putting through an application. I've spent hours researching the process and read reviews from other women who have donated (some donating multiple times) and have read nothing negative on the subject. While reading through the 'fine print' on the application, they state that 'for medical reasons,' only those under 160 lbs will be considered.

This not only upset me but pissed me off to the extreme. Seriously, what makes a (barely and shouldn't be by most standards) overweight person like me not be capable of donating eggs? It's it because our society has put such a strong image in our heads of a 5'9", 110 lbs blonde woman as the ideal body type that some one like me who is 5'4", 175 not worthy of giving an unfortunate couple the gift of life? What kind of crap is that?

It pisses me off so much that I can't even elaborate on it anymore.

I am still going to put through an application, but not until I reach their 'ideal' standards of the 'perfect' candidate.

Such bullshit.

It really was no miracle; what happened was just this ...

"The wind began to switch; the house to pitch. And suddenly the hinges started to unhitch ...
Just then, a witch; to satisfy and itch, went flying on her broomstick, thumbing for a hitch"

There's really too much to say right now that I must resort to bullet point form ....

• The wedding this weekend was definitely not what was expected. I expected a fun time drinking with a lot of my friends. Instead, it was a rather intimate gathering where we got lectured about our alcohol consumption because of the stupid 'future homemakers of Illinois' club or whatever bullshit they were apart of, and, needless to say, were forced to leave before the dancing started. I, however, will not go into why.
• Spent Sunday at Greg's parent's house. Went out to eat with his entire family + grandmother ... probably one of the last times everyone will be together for a while since his oldest sister & brother-in-law are moving to North Carolina September 1st.
• Finally watched "Back to the Future." Not going to lie, pretty awesome movie. Yes Greg, you were right.
• I am getting an apartment with Dana. I'm not sure if I mentioned this already but once she moves back to the area August 18th we're going to start looking at a few places. The commute will be less than 20 minutes and may even be as close as 1 mile. I will be getting exercise in daily if we get that one because I will either ride my bike or walk every day pending the weather.

And now the exciting portion

• Joey (a guy I work with) came back from vacation yesterday. My boss was not informed of this and I was supposed to work the 12-9 shift again this week M-F, going back to my 5:30-2 hours on Saturday. He came back and now I'm going back to my morning shift tomorrow. So, I left work early (6pm) so I wouldn't be over worked for tomorrow. I get home and discover we're under a tornado warning. After 30 minutes of hard core lightning right outside our window, the power goes out and Marianne and I are left in the dark with no flashlights. After spending an hour in the dark and sick of watching the pilot episode of "Dawson's Creek" on Marianne's computer, the power came back on.

I'm just glad I wasn't by myself. I would have freaked out and more than likely jumped in the car, not thinking about the weather, and drove to Greg's house. I don't like being alone during storms.

Well, that's all I've got. Time for bed. Night!

I before E except after C

Last night, for the 2nd time in a week, I have had a dream where it was the 1st day of school and I was a teacher. One time I was teaching 4th grade English, the 2nd it was high school science (yeah, I can see myself doing that ...)

For the 1st time in my life I finally feel like I know what I am supposed to be doing as my contribution to society. I want to be a teacher. I want to make an influence in the lives of future generations. I feel like I handle kids/pre-teens well. You still have some influence over their behaviors. I miss the days of creative book reports and spelling tests on Friday mornings. I miss grammar workbooks and journal writing. I want to go back to the days where times were easier. I loved 6th-8th language arts and I want to relive those days through the coming generations.

I am going to go back to school. I'm not exactly sure when but I know I won't start anything until I've lifted myself out of my self-inflicted debt. I don't know how long it will take to complete but I'm figuring a degree in journalism is a good base and may only have to take 2 years with a semester of student teaching. That doesn't seem unreasonable right?

I feel settled knowing I have a goal for myself and I know what I finally want to do. Abt is only temporary and I know that. I love my job (sometimes) but most of all I love the people I work with and I'm okay with staying there for now. But only for now. I'll be a teacher soon enough if all the cards play out. I just have to keep telling myself there's no hurry ... I'm barely 23 .... there's still time.

In current news, softball season is over. We lost yesterday and our team looked like crap. I know that 2 of our top sluggers were playing on the other team on a field across the way, but still. It just wasn't us out there. What I also didn't know was that in the play offs they put the B league teams against the A league teams. Now I don't find that fair. That's like putting a major league team against a minor league team in the world series.

Whatever, we had a lot of fun and still won money (I don't get to see any of it though ... we'll probably have a gathering of sorts) and got an awesome trophy with a spinning ball on it.

That's all I've got. Work work work. That's all I do. It's 11:30 now and I'm ready for bed. Didn't get off until 10 tonight. Yay overtime.

4 weddings and a funeral (or not)

There is nothing exciting going on in my life right now, except that I seem to be crazy busy. I can't believe how fast this summer has flown by. I don't feel like forming complete thoughts so I'll retreat back to the day of bullet points.

• Last night was a much needed GNO with Lauren. We went to Cheeseburger in Paradise for dinner & drinks and then went to see The Dark Knight over in Woodridge. We had to sit in the lower level since we got there 10 minutes before the movie but it was still amazing & even better the second time around.
• I may have just added 2 more weddings to this year. Lauren asked me to go with her to Kansas City (not sure which one) for Josh's wedding. I'm not so sure about that one. I would love to go but I would have to a) give up my Labor Day Weekend Saturday so I can have August 16th off and b) possibly use a vacation day for that Friday. That I'm not sure would go over so well. But I'm going to ask my boss when the time is right.
• The other wedding is October 4th and that's for Bob-ge-Bob's (Tony Merker). Same crowd as Josh's and I haven't seen those guys since ... well, since we were all on drumline together junior (or was it sophomore) year? I miss those days.
• And then I have Emily & Mike's wedding with John October 25 (I think). Why is everybody getting married this summer?
  
• Monday I start working the night shift (12-9) and I'll be back at my apartment. Fun times.
• Tonight is Nicole's birthday party at this Whirlyball place in Vernon Hills. It should be a fun time.
• And lastly, last night I paid $3.95 for gas. I still had half a tank but felt the need to fill up anyway because who knows if it's going to spike back up again.

Life is sad that way.

I have nothing witty to put here ...

Today pretty much rocked. Why you ask?

Because I got to sleep in (until 8:30) and didn't have to work until noon (yay!). I decided to go for a bike ride since I suck at exercising and really want to start losing weight. I only went about 2 miles because my bike (that I've had FOREVER) is quite uncomfortable ... I'm going to have to get a softer seat for it.

My Aunt picked me up at 10:30 and we stopped for lunch before going to work (hooray for not having to waste any gas!). Work was EXTREMELY busy up until I left at 9 to go play softball.

Softball ... the main reason for the rocking of the day.

It's playoff time and we completely kicked the crap out of this team. Actually, that's an understatement. We've won PLENTY of games due to slaughter rule this season (probably more than half) and this game was about 15-0 by the 3rd inning. Now we play next Monday (I'll have to adjust my hours to make sure I'm working a full day) AND Tuesday. I'm hoping to convince my parents to let me stay at their house next week so my aunt can continue to drive me while I'm working the night shift next week and the following.

Speaking of next week, I can't believe Andrew's wedding is next Saturday. Holy crap that came up fast. It'll be nice to see everyone again.

Well, I think it's time for bed. I just got home and am exhausted. I'm so used to going to bed at 9:30 that staying up until 11 is killing me. My body clock is going to be jacked up these next couple of weeks. I'll get used to staying up later (good new for Greg) and waking up when it's light outside. Then I'll go back to my regular schedule and everything will be a mess. This'll be fun.

I also think I'm going to head to work early tomorrow and work out for an hour and then shower there. That'll be a habit I have to try to get into.

Night!

And then the catch ...

Yesterday my dad enlisted my help shopping for a couple outfits to give my mom for her birthday. He also used that as an opportunity to inform me that I will not be moving back home and living without cost.

It's not as bad as it sounds.

My step-grandma Hannah's condo finally sold and now my dad has her money in an account with our bank. He was talking about just paying off my Visa (my main headache) and then I'll pay them back and he'll just put the money back into her account. I like that idea because then I'll be saving $40 a month in finance charges. Hopefully I can get him to do that this week. That would rock.

Also, he says that I am going to give him $250 a paycheck and then he is going to use that money to save for me for when I move out and also to help pay off the Visa.

So they are not actually keeping money, just not allowing me to get into the habit of just carrying around money. However, little do they know that I already have several other credit cards floating around that I have outstanding balances on. I'm going to do some math but I think I'll still be able to put more money towards my credit cards and lower my debt; especially if I get a second job.

At least I'll have one month of no rent that my parents won't take to use on a few credit cards.

In other news. Today I was left by myself to deal with a bunch of technicians. The other girl that works in the morning called in ... at 8am. When she was supposed to be there at 7:30. And our final softball game is tomorrow night ... at 9:15pm. Needless to say I'm working the later shift tomorrow AND my aunt is going to pick me up in the morning & drop me off. Hooray for saving a day of gas! Although gas is lower. I was actually able to get it for $4.08 yesterday. I know that's not the type of thing that one should rejoice over but it made me feel happy.

Laundry time.

I guess i'll be coming out of retirement too ...

Just something that's been bothering me for a few days.

Lately, all over the sports radio and sports television, everybody seems to be obsessed with the idea of Brett Favre being released from the Packers organization, 'coming out of retirement' and signing with a different team; like the Bears.

Now it's not the possibility of him signing with the Bears that bothers me; the team will still possibly suck. It's the 'coming out of retirement' thing that irks me.

Why?

Because he's not coming out of retirement. I don't know why everyone keeps saying this. You CANNOT come out of RETIREMENT unless you haven't played the sport for at least one season. He just played last year. Summer camps have barely started. It's technically still the off-season. They make him sound like he's been out of the game for 5 years. He JUST played. And cried like a baby (ok not really) in a -40 weather game.

Seriously people.

Okay, time for presents & birthday cake with my mom & dad.

Flaws are what makes us unique

Nothing is perfect. Everyone and everything has some kind of flaw. And while the Dark Knight is pretty damn close to perfect, there were a few imperfections that I didn't like.

Now, these are all merely personal preferences, not general accusations.

1) Christian Bale's 'Batman' voice was really started to bother me as the movie progressed. It gradually became deeper and less realistic.
2) They killed dogs. I don't like that in any movie. It makes me sad.
3) The initial TwoFace I did not like. The final TwoFace, complete with suit, was everything I wanted and more since Tommy Lee Jones originally portrayed the role. I understand the idea of it being more realistic but the popping red was missing.
4) The length. I'm not used to sitting through 2 1/2 hours not being able to get up or change positions. However, every minute was worth it.

That's really it. I loved every minute of it and was never bored, waiting for the next action sequence.

I give it an A+

Everybody has their superhero crush. Many girls will say Batman. Others will say Superman. Some will say Spiderman.

I, however, say Hellboy. Why? I don't know.

Hellboy II tomorrow!

Would you like to buy some cookies?

For the 4th consecutive day this week I've taken a nap after work. Totally not my style at all. However, it does make me feel so refreshed and away the following day at work so I guess not going to bed until 10:30-11 is worth it.

Tonight Marianne & I went to DQ for some thin mint blizzards. Holy crap, they are amazing. I miss girl scout cookies.

The healthy eating thing isn't going all that well, as you can tell by the ice cream. Granted I did make enough chicken cesaer salad to last me a few meals and I made chicken breast and vegetables tonight, but I did surcome to my obnoxious stomach on the way home from work and got a McChicken and small fries from McDonald's. I really need to start exercising. That's the main thing. I'm just not motivated at all. I think I'm going to have to start going to the gym at Abt after work. I just need to do it continuously instead of once every couple of days.

Alright, time for bed. Dark Knight tomorrow after work with John. SO excited!

I will survive!

Today at work was busy busy busy. We must be over our 'dry spell' because it's crazier than all get out and there is never a dull moment. Hopefully the 'no overtime' thing will cease and I can start increasing my paycheck a little bit.

I don't know if it's from sitting in a chair all day or what but the lower left side of my back was KILLING me today. It was almost to the point of unbearable when I was driving home. I put a hot pack on it when I got home and took a 2.5 hour nap. That seemed to dull it a little bit.

John called and wanted to hang out so we went to dinner & then over to his friend Carly's house and watched "Meet the Spartans" with a few people. Funny FUNNY movie. Now I've never seen '300' (and don't plan on it because I don't like battle movies) but I still got most of the references they threw in.

Now it's 10:45 and time for bed, even though I'm not really tired ... the downfall of naps in the afternoon. Nothing too exciting the next 2 days; maybe just a lot of working.

Night!

Someboy's got a case of the Mondays ...

Ain't that the truth. Today was ridiculously busy; and I mean more so than a typical Monday. Let's put it this way: I didn't leave until 3:15. I get off at 2. I completed auxed out (no phone calls would come into me unless they were calling me directly) and was working straight on things I had not finished yet for over an hour. It was insane. I did, however, get the UPS list down to about 3/4 of a page. Now you people have no idea what I'm talking about, but it's a BIG deal.

This Monday is also, sad to say, the last 'easy' Monday for a while. Becky, one of the girls in our department ... the youngest and most talkative ... put in her 2 weeks and her last day is Saturday. Our department is understaffed as it is, now it's going to be even worse. Oh well, I'll probably get some overtime out of it ... money is good.

After work (and traffic, boo) I went to Maurices and FINALLY managed to get my outfit for Andrew's wedding in a few weeks. None of my dresses I currently have really fit me anymore (a good thing I guess) and the few that do I either wore recently around the same people (music formal) or are WAY too short/slutty to wear to a wedding. So I opted for a dress top and dress capris. I really like it and it comfortable, which is the most important part.

Hmmmm ... what else what else. Greg didn't want me to go see Hellboy II this past weekend because it wasn't playing in Macomb. I tried to come up with something that he would not want to do and then therefore I could still go see it anyway (which I almost did, but my guilty conscience got the best of me .... stupid conscience). That didn't work and now this coming weekend is going to be JAM PACKED filled with movies. Friday John & I are going to see the Dark Knight, Saturday Greg & I are going to see Hellboy II and then Sunday we're going to see Mamma Mia before I head up to my parents again for the week.

Marianne's best friend from high school is coming up to visit so instead of her sleeping on the couch and me being loud and obnoxious at 3:30 am when I'm getting ready for work, I decided to spend the week at my parents (with the cat ... again). It'll actually work out pretty well because Sunday is my mom's birthday and I know she would really like it if I was there. The whole family will be together for the 2nd weekend in a row. Shocking.

Now for the best part about Mondays ...

Jon & Kate Plus Ei8ht!!!

It's the little things they do to show their appreciation ...

And then there are the BIG things ...

Today at work started out like any other Saturday. I got there at 5:30am, made sure all the parts were there for the technicians, played my typical 'mother' role to 52 grown men (and woman). On Saturdays I'm by myself. That's a lot of people to look up parts for and get out the door in a timely manner. But I get it done quickly and efficiently. It did help that today Rob, one of our washer techs, brought me a large vanilla iced coffee from McDonald's. Granted, he did lose a bet we made during the Wrigley installment of the Crosstown Classic, but it was still a nice surprise. Then came the BIG surprise. Rami, a refer tech and one my favorites, handed me a $20 bill and told me to buy lunch on him.

Ummm ... I didn't even know how to respond to that. I thanked him of course and just put it quietly into my pocket. Am I allowed to accept generous gifts like that? I guess it's not illegal, just generosity.

And they are so generous (most of them), which makes me love what I do even more. I want to do something for them. Maybe find out when their birthdays are and just get them a card; just something small like that. Something to show they aren't passed over and are included within the department.

It's days like this that make me want to do something special for someone, just for being them.

I did clean the house today and do the laundry because my parents are coming back from their cruise tonight. I took the dog for a nice long walk because it was nice out. I said hi to a couple of kids I saw playing outside.

It's the littlest things that make people feel good and appreciated. I need to remember that more often.

Just for the sake of putting words somewhere

Nothing even remotely exciting and/or interesting is going on in my life right now yet somehow I feel like I need to write something somewhere.

I think that's what is missing. I miss writing. When I was down at Western, I was involved in writing, virtually on a daily basis. Whether it be a column, news article, editing my writers pieces or even just laying out a page for the Courier. I was involved and that's all that mattered.

I don't do that now. My writing consists of petty, meaningless blogs complaining about my life and the financial struggles I'm having. I know I need to take a few steps back every hundred miles and look at it from the eyes of someone not involved. From an outsiders point of view I have a very comfortable and meaningful life. I have an apartment in which I am able to afford rent and utilities on. I have a job where I'm great at what I'm doing and I have co-workers who have told me on numerous occasions that they don't know what they'd do without me. I have an amazing boyfriend who loves me and would do (almost) anything for me and I have a cat who relies on me for survival.

I know I won't have this 'comfortable' life forever. I know I'll eventually have to leave Abt and pursue my dreams. But to do what? I don't know what my dreams are. Do I want to teach English? Do I want to work for a newspaper? What about a magazine? Who knows? I sure don't.

What I do know is that I want to write. Whether it be true life stories in teen magazines or little notes of encouragement on students papers, I want to put my degree to use.

What I don't understand, however, is why people keep asking me why I haven't started using my (really only 2 years of) college experience. What happened to that statistic where 60% of college graduates don't use their degree until they've already had 2 or 3 jobs under their belt? I'm only 22 ... 23 next month. I'm still young! I still have plenty of time to decide what I want to do.

I suppose I can start looking into freelance work; something I can do in addition to my current full time job. It's something to think about when I move back home. I know I'll have to get a second job to help relieve myself of some debt before starting the next journey in life.

The thing that I keep telling myself is that I don't know where I'm going to be in a year. Hell, I don't know where I'm going to be in 6 months. Things can change without warning. I can't plan ahead. I need to live day to day and just learn to survive that way. The rest will just fall into place.

I know it's a lot of rambling without much structure. But this is what goes on in my brain on a daily basis when I have time to myself to actually do some pondering about my life.

Does it make sense to anyone but me?

A 'journalist' complaining about the media? Never!

So I go to check my e-mail about 5 minutes ago and I come across this headline on the main page ...

"DA: New evidence clears Ramsey's"

Okay. I think it's time to break out my column, for the first time in a little less than 2 years.

Time for media to bury hatchet
08/23/07

For our parents' generation it was "where were you when JFK was shot?" For ours it's going to be "where were you on 9/11?" And lately it seems we can add "where were you when JonBenet Ramsey was murdered?" to that list of questions. But here's the thing about the latter: Who really cares?

Yes, she was only six when she was murdered the day after Christmas in 1996 in her middle-class Colorado home and I'm sure it was a heartbreaking experience for her family and friends, but it's 10 years later and people are still talking about it. I can understand still talking about Princess Diana or Martin Luther King Jr., but those were high-powered, well-known icons. Ramsey was just a typical 6-year-old who was forced to dress up in non-traditional outfits for her age and wear so much makeup that no one really knows what she actually looked like.

I'm going to completely ignore the whole child beauty pageant thing and move on to why America is still hooked on the murder of a potential future porn star.

Not to sound morbid, but children are murdered all the time. What makes this one so special?

A staff editorial on the news wire service www.copyboy.com that was published Monday entitled "How about some reverence for the Ramsey Case?" initially caught my attention. Don't get me wrong, I agreed with the point - that is, if I was still 11 and wearing my socks scrunched down over my jeans. But now it's 2006 and there are more important things going on in the world.

I'd throw in what I think happened to JonBenet, but that would take time and words that I don't have to spare.

Is it that people are just so used to hearing about this that they want to hear more? It seems that way because people feel more involved and essentially more intelligent when they are familiar with news headlines. But why not just open a newspaper and skim those articles? There are things that are actually affecting our lives today.

In an article titled "Why cable news pursues the JonBenet Ramsey case," Andrew Kohut, director of the Pew center for the People and the Press in Washington, states, "ratings will fall off but you'll still have a story that's big enough to move the needle and attract people who like this kind of stuff. That's what keeps cable news in business at times when there's not real breaking news."

Personally, if my child was murdered I wouldn't want it all over the news constantly. I feel bad for the family because they are constantly reminded of this terrible time.

They were normal people before this tragic event, and now they are the focus of the media and are constantly being reminded of the pain. That pain is always going to be there and that's hard enough to deal with without the made-for-TV movies and books that are being created.

Although reading through past reports and studies, the whole situation just seems a little off. Not only did the parents look incredibly suspicious at the time but John Karr, the latest suspect in the Ramsey case, said that he was with JonBenet when she died. OK.

Two questions come to mind. Why wasn't he questioned 10 years ago along with everyone else at the Ramsey house that day? And if he was with her, why didn't he do anything to help her - if he's innocent, of course.

This may be the first arrest linked to Ramsey but that still doesn't mean this case hasn't been beaten to death - whether or not the pun is intended is your choice. Karr's trial will probably last several months and, in that time, more speculation regarding Laci Peterson, Princess Di and maybe even the Lindberg baby will surface.

I'm surprised there hasn't been talk of suicide. If I was a 6-year-old being forced into all of these pageants and those outfits I would probably kill myself too.

For years there has been nothing new to report, yet somehow the case breaks headlines telling us something that was figured out years ago. For all we know Patsy Ramsey really did murder her daughter. Too bad she died in June. Now the world may never know the truth.

Seriously? This all needs to stop. It's been 12 years people! Kids die and get murdered all the time. What makes this 6 year-old-would-be-whore-when-she's-16 special?

Nobody gives a shit anymore. Get over it.

And while I'm bitching about the media: Amy Jacobson, you're a whore and need to be punched in the baby maker.

For those who don't know who Amy Jacobson is, she was the NBC news reporter who was caught over at Craig Stebic's house (husband and main suspect in the missing Lisa Stebic fiasco) with her 2 sons in her bikini. She was fired 5 seconds later and is now (almost a year later) suing NBC for invasion of privacy & because she had to move in to a smaller house because of her lack of employment. Boo frickin' hoo.

And adding to that subject, what makes Lisa Stebic special (and I don't mean this is a bad way since I know she's my friend's dad's cousin) but if I went missing I don't think it would make national news. People would assume me dead after a month and deal with it. Call it anti-hindsight or whatever, but it's true.

Okay, enough bitching for now. A Jon & Kate plus Ei8ht marathon is on and that should put me in a better mood. Plus I'm all sunburned from being outside at Great America all day.